It's probably been over ten years since I've watched Armageddon, but if I hear the song "I don't want to miss a thing," my throat gets tight and my heart aches... it's been so long I'm not even sure why anymore, but THAT'S the power of music.
Technically time travel doesn't exist, but turn on a song you listened to, sang or heard repeatedly at some emotionally charged point in your life and FEEL for yourself the power music has to transport you to another time and place.
Can I confess something to you? A dirty little secret?
My main issue with church as a kid was the music. *drops the mic
I wanted so badly to connect with God at church, but whenever the seemingly random songs were sung, and I read along with the repetitive and dry lyrics, I found myself angry rather than praiseful. Angry on behalf of God, whom we were supposed to be passionately praising. The lack of emotion evoked in the songs left me with a bitter taste in my mouth and a feeling that something wasn't altogether right, here.
I remember whenever that all changed. It was around sixth grade, whenever a friend, invited me to go to "Pre-games" where a bunch of us kids could walk to a local house after school and eat snacks, hang out and wait for the church van to pick us up, then we'd all ride together to church where our parents could pick us up afterwards.
I found something at that church that I had never experienced before. Something new and refreshing and PASSIONATE; tear-jerking praise and worship music, delivered by a rag tag band of Jesus loving people who led so many of us wayward youths into a closer walk with Him.
My heart was broken and yet strangely the ache deep in me was quenched at the same time.
I remember, it was Kyle Sherman (before he was big time on the radio, You Go Man!!!) who sang lead and played guitar.
It was so real and raw and I knew shortly after I started attending there that I would one day sing praise and worship on stage and lead groups to Jesus through the God given ability he had blessed me personally with.
That was the beginning of something.
Then, years later, after much living, learning and growing, I was invited to another church that took that love of Jesus and all things Kingdom to a whole new level.
I was compelled by the spirit in me to offer my time to help in any way I could, but ultimately I felt called to the praise team, and as He would have it, that's exactly where I found my overflow. I've never felt so passionate for the Lord as I did singing with those wonderful people. I would just close my eyes, raise my free hand, sing and sometimes cry as I swayed to the beat.
My heart was so full. It was the most amazing thing, to do something I've loved doing since I could speak, but have never been confident enough to do in front of anyone, until then.
I've been terrified to sing in front of anyone my entire life, and the story of how God developed me; my character, my maturity, and especially my Confidence, is quite something.
So I can sing... okay. Does that make it a Calling? I think so, but lets dig deeper.
One of the big questions I had for God, whenever I took my 40 Day Fast from church, was, "What am Called to do?"
The scary part is not that he answered, but the quantity of answers I received and continue to, today.
It's been revealed to me that there is a double meaning for that old scripture about the "talents" which in newer translations and in a literal sense are actually coins.
The meaning I received this time was that each person is given gifts, talents, abilities, what have you... You have a choice to make about what you will do with them.
You can do NOTHING and have NOTHING to show for your life whenever you meet your maker, or you can JUST DO IT. Whatever IT is. Do what you were made for, be it one thing or one thousand things.
I'm in a new season now. One of my many callings is to be a GOOD mother and wife, a constant struggle, I'll admit. Now, I'm teaching my littles how to sing and make music and especially to love the Lord.
We're not all called to be writers, or singers, or artists, or even mothers, but some of us are called to do all these things and more!
What will you DO with what you've been GIVEN?
-now I've got to go watch Armageddon on Netflix so I can remember the reason for the emotion and get a good cry out.
Be blessed, my friends,
Delanie
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